A few miles down, the pathway began to narrow and the jungle started closing in but I figured it was just an optical illusion. A few hundred yards more, the illusion became real because the jungle I was committed to staying away from was now invading my space and tapping on my shoulders. With each step, the jungle hugged me tighter which caused my heart to start racing as I stepped over downed trees and through tall grass. I had to endure this suffering for another 20 minutes before finally she released me onto the edge of a river.
I've come to realize that pathways are naturally comfortable places because we know hundreds of people have traveled safely down them before. They're little safety zones and the wider the pathway, the further the unknown (a.k.a. the jungle) is pushed out of our space. As I admitted earlier, I was scared as hell traveling down that pathway in Africa , especially as it became narrower but here are a few things I learned during this experience.
Tourist Love Wide Pathways
Rarely do I find anything special at the end of a big wide pathway. Odds are, at the end of a wide pathway will be stuff I already know and a bunch of tourist mulling around. For example, I know if I travel west on I-4 in Orlando, at the end will be a Magic Kingdom with a bunch of, yep you got it, tourist mulling around. In my life, I find all the fun and most interesting things off the wide pathway. It takes some guts to journey down a less traveled pathway or to make up your own because it forces you to wrestle with a lot of unknown stuff that sometime induces paralyzing fear and insecurity. There are no mile markers, exit signs or rest stops, so you're forced to deal with things as they come your way. But the beauty of the pathless journey, if that's what you want to take, is you have first shot at discovering some beautiful things, creating new pathways for others and start reducing your fears and insecurities about the unknown.
Travel Wisely
Don't be an idiot by travel down a narrow pathway or attempting to create a new one by yourself. These journeys require a good and wise guide if you desire to walk out the jungle unscathed or not wrestleing yourself out of the jaws of a wild beast. As a Christian, my guide is God, so I rely on him to guide my journeys from start to finish. Sometimes, I can be a control freak but when traveling unknown journeys, I try very hard to resist the temptation to take over or turn my guide into a copilot. Trying to take over the guide position on any journey that's unknown to you is a terrible thing to do. The point of a guide is to keep you away from danger, so that means it's best if you saddle your ego, shut up and follow their lead. In the case of Africa, God assigned me two 14 year old girls. These girls walked briskly, confidently and ordered me around but most important, they guided me safely in and out of that jungle.
Embracing The Experience
One of my fondness memories was when I looked back and saw a woman by the name of Daisy strolling peacefully through the jungle in the far off distance. At first, I feared for Daisy's because she was a little woman who was part of our group but quickly the fear was replaced by a powerful experience. A year prior to being in Africa, Daisy had lost her husband, the love her life, to cancer. For over a year she struggled daily with the fear, noise, insecurities and uncertainties that resulted from his death. In that moment, while strolling quietly on a pathless journey through a dense and dark jungle, God spoke to Daisy and brought her into his rest. Our experiences on the pathless journey were so different at that moment because I walked crippled in my fear and she walked peacefully in its embrace and as a result found a needed peace.
Time to Finish
At the edge of that river I was lead over a bridge made of sticks and bonded by straps of bark. Each step I took was bouncy and made the bridge creek but it was sufficient and resulted in one of the most awesome and peaceful experiences in my life.
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| Daisy and I in Freetown. |
Kyle Christian Steele
I think alot about pathways through dense forest. Physical pathways. I don't know what it means to be led by God- I gave that thinking up along time ago, and with it, any sense of ego or entitlement (thus, giving up the thought that I was important enough for God to have some type of pathway for me at all), but I suppose, we each have our own method of humbling ourselves. Maybe the ego is impossible to actually lose.
ReplyDeleteLiving in New Zealand, when I broke up with my boyfriend, I moved into a house next to a nature reserve. On the other side of the reserve were stores and at the time, my gym. It was dense. At certain places, I could no longer see the sky, just traces of sun peaking through. There were always rumors that people used the reserves to plant drugs or set up meth houses or whatever. I started hiking the path alone to get my milk, and sometimes, as a precursor for my workout. My mind has settled on that path these days. After my breakup I lost 60 pounds, which I gradually started putting back on since I started trying to juggle a desk job and a full time set of classes. But, it all started with that pathway through that nature reserve.
I like narrow pathways. I like places where people don't venture. I need to remind myself that, to obtain anything, you often have to take the hard, less traveled route. I'm growing tired of cars again. I miss forest. Maybe its time for me to move out of the country once again? To live a lifestyle where I don't sit in a cushy chair all the time, and I can walk to get my milk and bread everyday.
Thanks for your response and I really enjoyed it. First, I try very hard to be transparent and authentic in these post, so my mentioning of my faith is a result of that and not an attempt to sway people to my beliefs. Second, you are very important to God and certainly he talks to you all the time. May be you're not in a place to discern the beauty of His voice which is okay.
DeleteBased on your statement, I think you're in the forest and walking a narrow path right now. In fact, I would say that New Zealand is the wide path because it's familiar and presents limited obstacles. My argument is that people can grow from walking a narrow path or taking a pathless journey because it's foreign to them and uncovers hidden fears and strengths. I'd encourage you to embrace this time.
I have never felt you were trying to sway anyone with your beliefs, and because of that, I feel quite encouraged to keep reading your blog. Also, I'm addicted to 'travel' introspective writing.
ReplyDeleteI feel like I ran away from that country because things got too hard after my relationship fell apart. It kind of haunts me, like a continuous ghost. Many places stick with me-when I went to work in Chiapas Mexico (the poorest region of Mexico), I'm haunted by my stay with the Zapatistas in the rainforest and how little they had and how hard they worked.
I feel (probably like you) that I could contribute so much, in terms of community development, to the Central Florida Region, because there is a kind of cohesiveness lacking in this part of the country. My life is dedicated to community service. This is the passion that drives me, and it comes from my own, innate moral compass, but most assuredly, was nurtured by my very devout and religious parents. It just feels like its so much harder here (to really make a difference. To have people listen or respect my opinions, as a young black female). And my mind, continually, in my dreams, and conscious life, push me back to the beaches and forest of New Zealand.
Thank you for sharing. I enjoyed and learned from this :)
ReplyDelete